Refusing Lies, Choosing Truth

refusing-liesWe hear lies every day. The enemy throws them at us with unbelievable speed. I am convinced these lies are part of his arsenal of “fiery darts” that we read about in Ephesians. The sad part isn’t that the enemy lies, the sad part is how often we believe those lies.

This month I was sure I was pregnant again. This would have been so amazing for so many reasons. I’m 46, and I haven’t been pregnant in well over a year. I was going to tell Rob I was pregnant on our Anniversary, and the baby would have been due around Father’s Day. I even made him a special card. It all seemed so perfect that I didn’t mind the crushing fatigue, nausea, and dizziness. But I wasn’t pregnant.

I did not expect the overwhelming disappointment, hurt, and even anger that swept over me. I had given this to the Lord, and I was okay with Him not giving us children to hold. It was hard, but I was at peace, and I had joy. But I had allowed myself to hope again. I wish I could say I handled it with grace. I didn’t. It was a very rough night. I cried. I told God exactly what I thought. I cried. I told Rob I had some serious questions for God when we get to Heaven. I cried some more. Then I started speaking the truths I knew aloud.

I Chose Truth

I told God I didn’t understand why He gave children to those who would hurt, abandon, and abuse them, but withhold them from us, but I trusted Him. I didn’t feel loved in that moment, but I knew He loved me. I didn’t even like His choices, but I knew they were good, because they came from Him…and He always does right. These were not things I felt, but things I knew to be true. The enemy was throwing lies at lightening speed. I had a choice. I could believe him (and my own deceitful heart), or I could choose to believe what I knew (but didn’t feel) to be true. I chose truth. Not because it was easy, but because I knew it was right. And because I knew it was the only path to having peace and joy.  By morning, peace and joy had returned.

This sounds like it was an easy and quick battle. Maybe it was pretty quick, but it wasn’t easy. And it wasn’t my first time on this battlefield. I had been here before, and I was defeated here more than once. That defeat was not pretty, and I didn’t want to go there again. The results of defeat on this battlefield is bitterness and anger. It paralyzes. It crushes. It destroys. I wasn’t willing to live like that again.

Choose You This Day

Today you have a choice. When it looks like God has forgotten, forsaken, and crushed you, you can choose to believe lies or truth. Truth brings freedom. Truth brings peace. Truth brings joy, even in the midst of pain. What will you choose today? Will you believe the enemy’s lies, or will you believe God’s truth?

10 thoughts on “Refusing Lies, Choosing Truth

  1. Dollie says:

    My heart is broken for you and Rob, but so thankful for your faith in the Lord. Praying for you all. Love you so much.

  2. Elissa Berg says:

    I love this so much I printed it out! I don’t think it is an accident that you wrote it. It has been something I’ve been struggling with. Sometimes I can let my mind go wild and I’ll start getting depressed about things that have happened in my life when I think about them really hard(Just being honest!) But one truth I’ve been thinking about lately, is CLAIMING God’s promises. When satan tells me, “God’s doesn’t care” or “Is He really good?” I need to combat it with His truths! 🙂 Love you, Myra! Thank you for writing what’s on your heart! It has blessed me SO much! Sending you a hug!

    • myranoel says:

      I love you! I know it’s been a really difficult season for you. My heart aches for the pain that you and your family are enduring, but I know His grace is sufficient. Keep claiming His promises and refuse those lies, my friend!

  3. Debi Barlow-Hall says:

    Myra my heart breaks for you and Rob! I’ve had two miscarriage’s and they were both devastating! One of our pastor’s and his wife struggled for years with infertility for several years and now have three children and one due soon..only God knows the reason and why we go through these devastating trials and losses…I know I really struggled with my anger and disappointment after my divorce.I was so devastated and hurt and angry! I didn’t understand why me and my children went through so much pain and agony only for the promise I so clearly “heard from God”.. not happen!”I love you cousin and I know God loves you too..and that is where we walk by faith not by sight! Big hugs!

    • myranoel says:

      I love you too! I’m sorry you had to go through that, but isn’t it sweet to know our God is always faithful? Getting through the dark days, and looking back to see His faithfulness is indescribable. Hugs to you too.

  4. Danette Welborn says:

    Oh my! I have been praying for you and Rob, and praying God’s will for your family. There have been sleepless nights that God has brought you to my heart. I didn’t know specifically what to pray for, but I prayed for the things I knew, such as your ministry and your desire for a family.

    I can’t even begin to imagine the pain you have gone through, but through human eyes…I ABSOLUTELY understand your thoughts and battles. Although we all have DIFFERENT struggles and trials, we ALL have struggles and trials. However, Satan wants to convince you that you are alone in it all, and no one cares or knows. What could “I” possibly tell you, that you don’t already know? Nothing. You are a Godly woman and mature in the Lord. I would just encourage you to continue in rehearsing God’s truth. Even when it’s painful and doesn’t make sense, He is a good God and He is ALWAYS good.

    • myranoel says:

      Danette, thank you for your prayers. I cannot imagine the pain you have endured either, and I pray for you. Isn’t it comforting to serve a God that is worthy of our praise, even in the hard times? And isn’t it wonderful how He puts friends and family in our way to encourage us when we need it? Love you!

  5. Myra,
    Oh, how well I know your thoughts, feelings & pain! Not exactly, not all of it, but so much. That monthly wait with breath held, pretending to yourself, and those around you that you are ok but inside you are counting the days and hours, waiting, hoping, praying that THIS is the month.
    I spent seven years of my life thinking, dreaming and praying pregnancy and baby. (As you well know.)
    And as you know, I also have tearfully and brokenheartedly lost seven darling babies to Heaven through miscarriage.
    With you, I know that in all my trials and losses over the years, the times I turned to God were far easier to get through and heal from than the ones I tried to “Handle” on my own.
    I love you and am hurting with you. I am praying for you both.

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